Whatever it is you wish to create in your life or business, you’re in the process of manifesting. Even if you don’t call it that.
Manifesting is such a fun thing to talk about! But I’ve seen many a well-intentioned manifesting teacher make this a dense heavy thing for others by repeating something they think they heard Abraham Hicks say. That thing that instantly tenses up a would-be LOA-wunderkin and keeps them from receiving that which they actually desire? The idea that one must be strictly “high vibe” or “good vibes only.”
I LOVE a good vibe like we all do, but I refuse to buy a damn thing that proclaims “good vibes only.” Because that’s just not fucking realistic! Or fair!
And look… I’ve always been a fan of Sylvia Plath and Edgar Allen Poe and all those dark literary gods who can so well convey heaviness. I have always appreciated my heaviness, my darkest moments. I have LOVED a good cry.
There’s NO WAY you were put here on this planet in your body to not feel the whole range of emotions.
You’re here in a body that is a FEELING INSTRUMENT complete with the capacity to feel the whole range of human emotions, vibrations, sensations. (Unless you’re a psychopath, and I don’t mean that lightly as psychopaths have a diminished capacity to feel.) Still, you’re here with an impressive capacity to feel. How dare someone tell you you shouldn’t feel a specific emotion or set of them!!
None of the feelings or emotions you feel are wrong.
You get to feel all of those feelings and express them. You get to have a freak out or meltdown if you need to. You don’t want to push it down, push it away. You don’t want to make the emotion “wrong” because when you do that, you’re essentially just sticking yourself with it. You’re making it hang out forever and ever and ever. It’s gonna drag you down versus if you just trusted yourself to feel what you feel and let it move through you, then you’d be free to get back to a new perspective, to feeling good, to believing you get to have what you want.
This week I had an unauthorized charge made to my bank account, and it took a few days from when I saw the charge until the bank could initiate the dispute. One of the days I was waiting, I went into a meltdown.
Some part of me thought the world was ending and needed to feel it, to feel all the fear, to feel all the concern. I let myself cry hysterically, gasping for air, feelings like I was being squashed to death. I noticed how I was telling a story that so many areas of my life are meaningless, an old story of “nothing I do matters,” and I noticed that these stories and ideas hurt SO BADLY because I wanted the opposite to be true.
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As I had my meltdown, I was aware of my own awareness. I heard the wisest part of myself talk lovingly and reassuringly. “That’s not true, but I know how true it feels to you. The worst doesn’t have to happen. This charge can be reversed.” I even noticed this wisest part of me saying, “And even if it ‘sticks’ and the money is essentially gone, it’s OK because (blank), and (blank), and (blank).” I noticed how the bratty part of me (for lack of a better term, but not meant as self-judgment) was refusing to believe it could be OK.
The meltdown happened. And it passed in about 10 minutes. I think it concluded with both the wisest part of me and the most deeply pained part of me mutually agreeing to disagree. I knew that both ideas existed within me: the idea that I’d be OK if the charge “stuck,” and the idea that I would die if it did.
The wisest part of me may have had the last word on that when today, a couple of days after my meltdown, I realized, “I’ve survived 100% of my bad days. I’ve survived 100% of the situations that I thought were world-is-ending-level catastrophic.”
The thing is… When you have the meltdown or the freak-out or even just a moment of sadness, you don’t need to tell yourself the story that now, because you let a ‘bad vibe’ in, you can’t get what you want. I encourage you to actively refute that unhelpful idea. When you hear someone say that you must be high-vibe or positive to make shit manifest, simply say, “That’s interesting,” and move on. Or say, “Delete!” Delete that idea!
Feel what you feel, honey. It’s absolutely perfect.
Create a Life Beyond Belief
December 1, 2019