How long have you gone rumbling down Desire Highway on a pony tire installed by ego?
Yes, you want things. It’s good to want things. To have things you desire to be, do, have.
We’re not so afraid of the word “want” around here. The act of wanting something, of “desiring” it as spiritual teachers somewhat arbitrarily decided is a better word than “want,” doesn’t mean you cannot have it.
The Universe is always saying yes to us unless the desire is born of ego and it would cost us greater misalignment if we were to receive it.
Maybe the baby hasn’t been conceived yet because you want it too much for the need to identify as a mother (and assuming that you have to have birthed your own baby to identify as a mother).
Maybe the business hasn’t taken off yet because you haven’t allowed yourself to understand how joyful the WORK will FEEL, and the Universe doesn’t want to give you the external success until you’ve made space to allow the good feelings about and because of the work.
Maybe the perfect home hasn’t shown up yet because the Universe wants you to understand that the studio apartment you live in doesn’t define you, could never define you, and that the “perfect home” will still be the perfect home after you’ve lost interest in it because it will be the place your energy resides until you allow another (that makes it perfect).
The Universe is always saying yes. Sometimes it adds, “and you’ll have it as soon as you allow your ego to step aside.”
Is there an ego-based reason you think you need the experience you’ve wanted for so long and not yet had?
I got real honest with myself today and did some channeled handwriting, filling like 12 pages in a spiral notebook, around the idea that my business will be in a much different place if I connect with the joy of the work. Yes… four paragraphs up *is* about me.
I’ve been making business success all about the good feelings of the outcome of lots of money received and people helped, but I didn’t truly anchor into how good it feels to offer service to others.
I’m tempted here to write, “God, forgive me!” And it’s really embarrassing to admit that there literally, before today, had not been space in my being to experience the joy of service.
I’ve coached others and it hasn’t felt the way that great. I told myself this was understandable. They hadn’t paid the full fees I wanted to receive for my work. My ego said, “Of course I’m not gonna feel good about coaching someone who paid peanuts for my time and energy.” But that’s EGO — and in, “ew, go [away, you ugly perspective]!”
There is so much potential for how good my work gets to feel if I can remember to take ego out of it.
And it seems I’m in the space to allow that potential!
The last 6 months of my life have seen me become a different woman. I made so many changes to my ways of being that I now see are fully connected and have built on one another to give me a “leg up.” I take daily walks, I eat more simply, I meditate daily, I read about 3 books per week, and I’ve come full circle back to something I did in 2017: writing a daily blog. I’ve built these habits upon each other and am, quite truthfully, blown away by my capacity to be consistent with these practices.
Now I know these things have piled atop one another and given me structure to believe I can make any change I desire as well as the ways to recognize where I’ve created misalignment, as I realized today I have done in my coaching business by not truly perceiving of or allowing the heights of joy that I can experience in the process of a thing.
And I’ve gotta rejoice that my openness to improvement in my physical condition, which led me to diet changes that led to dropping two clothing sizes, has shown me in the past six months that when I surrender to the process I get so much out of it with more ease than when my ego is all involved.
I can create incredible, miraculous results through choosing to experience the process!
What a death blow to the ego! Haha
So now I’ve shared with you, even though it felt squeeze-me-until-I-can-barely-breathe icky, the exact way that the Universe has been saying “Yes, and you can have it as soon as your ego gets out of the way,” to what has been my biggest desire for the past six years. I’m totally “to blame” for the Universe holding off on delivering the experience I have longed for. And I feel the need to specify in different words, that I LONGED FOR IT AND EXPERIENCED PAIN BECAUSE I KEPT TELLING MYSELF THAT IT MEANT SOMETHING FOR ME NOT TO HAVE IT AND THAT I COULD NOT EXPERIENCE JOY EXCEPT IN THE ACHIEVEMENT OF A THING LIKE THE SALE OF A BIG COACHING PACKAGE.
What have you wanted, and felt pain (maybe unbearable pain) not having the experience of, that you haven’t yet received? Is there some way that you’ve confused the feelings you’re meant to have in the PROCESS of the thing with the feelings your ego tells you won’t be felt until you have a specific result? If you can simply IDENTIFY the way this has been present for you, you’ve done deep, damn important work today!
In the channeled handwriting I did (see the picture for just one page!), I repeatedly got the message that I can practice feeling the joy. That’s my simple homework. Practice feeling the joy of being in service in the ways I’ve long wanted to be, and have been (without appreciating it because I’m human and it happens that sometimes we do the exact things we want without appreciating them).
I think if you allow yourself to simply identify how you’ve done to yourself around your own goals (similarly to what I did to myself), you’ll then find that the homework is as simple as mine.
Now, let’s go…
Create a Life Beyond Belief!
October 1, 2019