Always Wanting More

Prayer

Is anything ever enough when you live according to your desires?

In my experience, No.

And one night in the last few weeks, as I walked through a parking lot, a bag of junk food on my wrist, I talked to God.

Talked about the desperation I felt to be, do and have more in my life.

To become a wife, a mother, experience greater success in my business, to live in a bigger home than a studio apartment I feel we outgrew years ago.

“I want more,” I said.

Sullenness turned to tearful surrender as I prayed:

“Be the ‘more’ in my life, God.”

It felt medicinal.

So I repeated myself: “Be the more. Be the more. Be the more. Be the more, God. Be the more.”

On and on until I approached the door of my apartment building, growing quiet to avoid any eavesdroppers in the lobby.

I keep coming back to this prayer.

I say it again aloud as I write now: “Be the more in my life, God. Please. Be the more.”

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